Toxic Positivity
The Truth About ‘Good Vibes Only’ – How Toxic Positivity Keeps Us Stuck
We’ve all heard it before: “Just be positive!” “Good vibes only!” “Don’t dwell on the negative.”
While these phrases might be well-intended, they often dismiss the full range of human emotions. This is what’s known as toxic positivity—the pressure to stay upbeat while ignoring or suppressing anything uncomfortable.
The problem? Emotions don’t just disappear when we push them aside. They get stored in the body, shape our behaviours, and often resurface in ways we don’t expect. True emotional well-being isn’t about staying ‘high vibe’ all the time—it’s about allowing yourself to feel everything so emotions can move through you instead of getting stuck.
What Is Toxic Positivity?
Toxic positivity is when optimism is used to dismiss real emotions, making it seem like feeling anything ‘negative’ is wrong. It sounds like:
“It could be worse.”
“Just focus on the good.”
“Happiness is a choice.”
“Don’t be so negative.”
While there’s nothing wrong with positivity, forcing it at the expense of genuine emotions creates a disconnect. It teaches us that some feelings aren’t acceptable—when in reality, all emotions serve a purpose.
The Cost of Suppressing Emotions
When we suppress emotions instead of working through them, they don’t disappear—they build up. This can show up as:
Chronic tension, especially in the jaw, shoulders, or stomach
Emotional numbness or feeling disconnected from yourself
Sudden emotional outbursts because suppressed feelings don’t stay buried forever
Exhaustion or burnout from constantly pretending everything’s fine
The body is designed to process emotions, not store them. When we suppress them, we only delay the release—often making it harder to deal with later.
What Healthy Emotional Processing Looks Like
Instead of forcing yourself to ‘stay positive,’ try these approaches for moving through emotions in a healthy way:
Acknowledge what you’re feeling – Name it without judgment: “I feel frustrated.” “I feel hurt.” This creates space for processing rather than suppression.
Move emotions through your body – Shaking, stretching, breathwork, or even a deep sigh can help release built-up tension.
Express instead of overanalyze – Crying, journaling, or even making sounds (like sighing or humming) can help emotions move naturally.
Redefine positivity as wholeness – True well-being isn’t about avoiding discomfort—it’s about creating space for all emotions without judgment.
Real Emotional Well-Being Isn’t About ‘Good Vibes Only’—It’s About Feeling Fully
Letting go of toxic positivity doesn’t mean drowning in negativity. It means allowing yourself to experience the full spectrum of emotions—both light and heavy—without guilt.
Because real relief doesn’t come from avoiding emotions. It comes from feeling, processing, and releasing them.
Have you ever felt pressured to ‘stay positive’ even when you were struggling? What’s helped you process emotions in a healthier way?